26 April 2010

THE LONG WALK

Visual Poetry by Individualist

Note this poem contains a mature theme. There is no gratuitous sexual references or violence or bad lnaguage. However the subject matter is best not discussed with any one under the age of 18.



I have found a new website that gives examples of many more poetic forms at Sol Magazine.org.   I came across this poetic form for inspiration called the Dorsimbra which I thought I would try out as it gives me a chance to branch into free verse. The Dorsimbra is comprised of three stanzas of four lines and each has a very different meter. The first stanza is four lines of rhymed Iambic Pentameter. The second stanza is four lines of short free verse and the last stanza are four lines of Iambic Pentameter Blank Verse. The poem appears choppy and disharmonious like a song written in a minor key. This guided me to the choice of subject matter which I will discuss in below.

I decided that like the Triolet poem Jazz Man which I wrote that I would write three sets of Dorsimbras tied together in a theme with a silent spacer picture to set mood. I also thought that in this way I could write seven different poems. I purposely chose the wording so that the first, second and third verses of each poem if read together sounded out a separate set of verse. Thus there are seven poems altogether if you include the three Dorsimbras as one poem. The second free verse poem includes a Count Up. This is where the first line starts with one syllable and each successive line adds one syllable until you reach 10 syllables in the last line.

As to the subject matter as I stated above the Dorsimbra suggested to me an off key meter and so as I began to think of the theme I came back to an event that happened with someone I knew. They committed suicide and it is an event that disturbed me.

Once a theme takes hold and I begin thinking about the stanzas and lines it kind of stays in my head until I finish it. It’s as if the poem takes over. I can’t explain this any better than that.

The first versions of this poem had too many personal details while no one else would know still seemed inappropriate. The next version I tried to tell the story from the actor’s perspective and it was very dark and it felt wrong. I realized this was not about him my dealing with it. In the last version I attempted to break the verses into different perspectives. The first verse is a more personal stance from the perspective of someone who knows the individual. The second is more objective and observational and the last speaks to the subject’s thoughts. I felt this was more respectful as it generalizes the subject and speaks to the emotions. I felt this I could publish.

With regard to the theme I will say only this. Anyone who finds that they are in a position where they can understand why someone would do such a thing should find someone they trust and discuss it. I am not suggesting that you obsess or worry or even that there is something wrong. Just that discussing it cannot hurt. Had this individual had such a conversation someone might have helped them.

2 comments:

  1. Thanks Andrew,

    Tnis was as much a purging as it was a creative effort. I promise the next couple will be lighter.

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